


Sæglópur

by gwenyn_bright



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Boat Sex, F/M, Heterosexual Sex, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Some Fluff, Some Humor, uneven feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-11 03:42:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,979
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28428729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gwenyn_bright/pseuds/gwenyn_bright
Summary: Pieck propositions Porco before they infiltrate the Walls of Paradis.
Relationships: Porco Galliard/Pieck Finger
Comments: 26
Kudos: 162





	1. The Proposition

**Author's Note:**

> Standard disclaimer: Not mine, did it for fun, English is not my first language, not beta-read, etc.
> 
> Please leave a comment if you enjoyed the fic! I love reading what parts you liked the most <3

Porco Galliard and Pieck Finger had fought together in countless battles since childhood. Even before he inherited the Jaw Titan from that poor girl, Porco had been an active-duty soldier. He had been in combat in the frontlines, in the infantry in the trenches, even briefly as part of the Panzer unit that Pieck’s Cart Titan carried on its back during attacks.

They had both survived, and that was both a blessing and a curse. Surviving meant they had to keep on fighting for the Marleyan colonization efforts until the day they died.

Every time they left their home in Liberio to go to another foreign country, it was a little less difficult than the last one. Not that it was easy. It would never be easy. But it became mundane: killing people (hundreds or thousands of them in a single day), the constant threat of being killed… At some point, it had stopped being a burden and it just became another aspect of their lives. It was only natural when it was something they had been doing for over a decade.

Then Paradis had raided their hometown.

Neither of them could remember a time when they had been so afraid. Not even in their first battle at the ages of 10 and 12, when neither of them had inherited a Titan. Despite the constant threat of death due to their inexperience and vulnerable human bodies, they had had the safety of being on the side of the Marleyan army. As usual, it was vastly superior to the small makeshift army of the tiny country they were trying to colonize, but it had still been a challenging battle.

The Warrior candidates had learned at that time that, no matter how large the Marleyan army was, they should always assume the country they were invaded had the upper hand. They knew the land and the people, and they probably held their fair share of secrets that no spies or infiltrators could discover.

So it didn’t make sense. This wasn’t supposed to happen. Paradis was a small, pre-industrialized, isolated island with little to no knowledge about Marley. How could they have caused so much damage  _ inside _ an enemy’s country, where they had no tactical advantage and were clearly outnumbered?

The terrorist attack wiped out Marley’s leaders and top officers, impaired their defenses, killed thousands of civilians and foreign diplomats (both in the attack and as a result of injuries suffered in it), and left the city in shambles.

Massive funerals were held every day due to the losses. The Warriors were so busy they had only had the chance to attend the military one where the fallen soldiers —including Pieck’s team from the Panzer unit and Udo and Zofia— were honored. Zofia’s ashes were collected by her distraught parents, while Porco and Pieck had had to receive Udo’s, since his widowed mother was also killed during the attack.

While they were unable to attend any other funerals of memorials, the deaths were still a heavy load in their hearts. They were born and raised in Liberio, and now that crowded internment zone they called home seemed half-empty. Close and distant relatives had been killed, childhood friends, neighbors, people whose name they didn’t know but who were part of their daily lives: the baker, the grocery store clerk, the flower shop attendant…

They mourned for all of them while planning the counterattack. Reiner had been adamant about retaliating as quickly as possible and all of the Warriors, Colt, and even the now-General Magath had backed him up immediately. Paradis with Zeke by their side was a threat that could not be ignored for months while waiting for the other countries to piece up armies Marley had previously obliterated. 

Even with the heavy losses suffered during the attack, they still had a large sea fleet, the air fleet, 30,000 men and women stationed all over the continent, a whole division who had been in training, and three of the Nine Original Titans. They had enough, and the quicker they acted, their chances of success increased.

The rescue of Gabi and Falco, who had boarded the enemy zeppelin during the raid, was an unspoken priority between the Colt, the Warriors, and General Magath, but the official objective was to neutralize the threat that posed Eren and Zeke Yeager to the world.

They were all heavily involved with the strategy, but Reiner and Pieck, who were the most familiar with the island, did most of the work. Everything was done behind closed doors —with Zeke's betrayal and the present threat of traitors and infiltrators of the Eldian Restoration Movement in every level of the military, they couldn't risk their plan being leaked.

In time-sensitive or compromised circumstances, the military would not develop a strategy until they were well on their way to their destination, so they played it straight. As soon as ships were available, they would board and set course for Paradis.

So, when Pieck and Porco said good-bye to their respective parents, they did so with the finality of someone who would not be coming back. Porco had taken the time to redact a will and leave all of his affairs in order, so that if the time came his parents could receive the pension provided by the Marleyan government for the rest of their lives. Pieck had cashed in as much money from her paychecks as possible. Her father’s health deteriorated every day despite the medical treatments, so she considered having the money in hand would make things easier for him. They left long, heartfelt letters thanking them for everything, then placed them somewhere that would be easy to find if they died, but not in plain sight. No point in distressing them before it was necessary. They had suffered enough.

~*~

The warship Porco, Pieck, and Colt are on arrives at the northeastern coast of Paradis island in record time, which puts them ahead of schedule. They are about 15 kilometers off-land and will stay in that position at least until Reiner and General Magath, along with the rest of the fleet, catch up. They had had to stay behind for a couple of days to supervise the preparations of the ships that had the framework to assemble the zeppelins for the air attack.

Currently, Pieck is briefing the officers on board about Porco’s and her part of the strategy in the most general terms possible. Tomorrow, when Reiner and General Magath arrived, they would be able to consolidate the plan, as the information was much too important to risk being intercepted —they had no idea what kind of technology the Paradisians had available.

To have an Eldian as a tactician for an invasion would have been unheard of just weeks before, but if anyone could break the barrier of intolerance it was Pieck Finger. Porco admired her from the other side of the room as she confidently explained the map spread on the table. She is intelligent and cunning, able to explain complex ideas in the simplest way possible so anyone could understand, and an accomplished orator. Only she could pull off saying something like “We will show the true strength of the Marleyan army to those devils!” in a way that pumped the officers and made them forget for a second she, too, was a devil.

The meeting ended on a high note, and the conference room was quickly vacated except for the Warriors and Colt. Pieck immediately reverted to her usual self as she slumped on a chair, closing her eyes and sliding down until half her butt hung from the seat.

“Porco, can you please go to the ship station to check the status on the recon team?” she requests without looking at him.

“On it,” he replies and makes his way out of the room. He listens to her lazy “Colt, be a dear and help me with the map” and then is out of earshot. He tries not to think about how hard and tiring it must be for Pieck, having all of this responsibility on her shoulders. He wishes he could do more for her, share some of that burden, but…

Well, he is good at following orders and improvising in the battlefield, but had some trouble with military tactics at large scale, especially considering their goal was not colonization but neutralization. Even Reiner, he had to admit, was better at this with his years of experience in Paradis. Despite the huge failure of that mission, he had gained a lot of insight that Porco, used to a set of clear-cut instructions, could not dream to imitate at this point. So he helped Pieck in whatever she needed, even if it meant being a gofer for the time being.

The two of them would soon be on their own, maybe even as soon as tomorrow night if all went well. They would make their way to the Walls and then to the Stohess district to infiltrate the Military. The air attack would come later, depending on how things developed.

As he enters the ship station, he gives a brief salute before asking for a status update. A small recon team on two motorboats had been sent to the shore to do an initial scouting of the surrounding area, and they had been reporting back via radio at 45-minutes to 1-hour intervals. So far, it seemed the rocky coast had been a good choice —Pieck had deduced that it would be hard to reach by horse (the only travel method on the island as far as they knew) and that its geography probably allowed for thick fogs at this time of the year that would help conceal the warships, as well as other beneficial factors. She had been right on all counts, of course. As expected of Pieck.

“Nothing out of the ordinary so far, Mr. Galliard,” the officer in charge of the radio assures him. “Last transmission was 15 minutes ago, and there is another one scheduled 30 minutes from now. Also, we had contact from MS Monte, it appears they will reach our location in 20 hours.”

11:00 a.m. of the next day. That was perfect for Pieck’s plan, they would be just on schedule if Reiner and Magath managed to arrive by that time.

He thanks her and exits the room, and as he descends to the deck he notices Pieck walking toward him. His whole body relaxes as he spots her, even though they had been together just a few minutes ago. She seems to have regained some of her spark back as she salutes him formally.

“Any news, Mr. Galliard?” she asks him with a hint of a smile.

“All in order, Ms. Finger,” he responds, imitating her businesslike tone. “General Magath and Deputy Chief Braun are slated to arrive by 1100 hours tomorrow.”

Porco feels his heart swell as Pieck’s face lights up at his words.

“Oh, thank goodness,” she sighs. “If I have to praise the Marleyan War Machine once more I may hurl myself into the sea.”

Seeing how relieved she is, he regretfully wishes he could do more for her, even though both of them, as well as Colt, have been giving themselves fully to this mission. The days seem to be too long and too short; time no longer made a lot of sense as they worked hours into the night and slept either too little or too long, but they all carried on.

They walk side by side until they reach the railing and lean on it. The thick fog affects the visibility, which is a good thing for them, but they are only able to see a black nothingness where blue sea should be, and then it fades into an opaque white.

“Please don’t. That would be a waste of a perfectly good Warrior.”

“And you know how we have a shortage of Warriors these days.”

They both smile wistfully at the dark water below them and fall silent for a few moments.

"Would you like to spend the night with me?" Pieck asks.

Porco turns to look at her and she is already observing him, her face full of an innocent neutrality that confuses him. He knows he is not the brightest of the Warriors; Pieck and Zeke were always the ones to take that honor, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t smart. Still, it takes him an embarrassingly long amount of time to connect her words to the meaning behind them. As soon as the realization hits him, a furious blush spreads across his face.

"Just the two of us?" he asks stupidly.

Unlike regular soldiers who had to sleep in close quarters, Warriors were allowed the luxury of separate rooms when the facilities allowed for it; at the most, there would be two people to a room. In Pieck's case, being the only female Warrior, she always had a room to herself.

"Yes. There is only one bed."

“Oh… I see,” he says, trying to buy time for his brain to catch up and stop embarrassing him. He finally nods after a few seconds. "Sure. I'll… At what time should I drop by?"

"Hmmm… I have to review some old reports on Paradis, but I think I should be done by 8:30 or 9:00."

"Okay."

“Okay.”

They both stand in front of each other, not breaking eye contact. Pieck is curious about what Porco will do, as he is so obviously flustered.

“Okay,” he says again after a while.

“Okay,” she repeats with a hint of amusement.

He leans forward, hesitates for a second, then kisses her cheek softly. “See you then,” he says, avoiding her gaze and walking away quickly as he shoves his hands in the pockets of his bomber jacket.

Pieck can’t help but bite her lower lip as a lopsided smile appears and reaches up to touch the place where his lips had pressed against. That was unexpectedly sweet.

“I am not coming back tonight,” Porco informs Colt, his roommate. If he were bunking with Reiner, as usual, he would definitely not be telling him this, but Colt was the sort of person who would get worried and the first thing he’d do is go ask Pieck if she knew where he was.

“Oh, I know. Miss Pieck told me,” Colt says.

“She what?!”

“I helped her get some documents and maps to her room earlier, and she said you two would be getting busy tonight,” Colt explains, not a hint of malice or suspicion in his expression. Porco raises an eyebrow but finally lets it go. Colt is like that: innocent, trusting, and maybe a little bit of an airhead.

That is why Pieck always uses double entendres when talking to Colt if Porco is present. Porco resists the urge to laugh until tears form in the corners of his eyes due to the Warrior candidate's endearing obliviousness. This time, though, Porco does not find it funny. She deliberately used those words knowing full well the Warrior candidate would repeat them to him. She had used Colt as a vehicle for her teasing, and her playful smirk appeared in his mind as clear as if she were there.

The realization that Pieck had already set up this part before she even propositioned him annoys him. Is he really that transparent?

“Yeah, well…,” Porco mumbles, trailing off.

Colt smiles at him and moves to sit on his own bed. Beneath his pillow is his journal, and inside a picture of his family, which he observes with the utmost love and affection every morning and evening. Porco has noticed how he strokes the bottom right side of the photo with his thumb, where Falco is, and has to fight his own instinct to think about his brother.

Porco lays back on his bed and stares at the ceiling. He can hear Colt rummaging through his backpack and taking out a small book —poetry, he assumes. 

He forces himself to think about the issue at hand: Pieck. Despite knowing that Colt's innocuous behavior over him spending the night in her room should not mean anything, he starts doubting the nature of her invitation.

Had he misread her intentions? If she had asked Colt to help her get documents, maybe she means to pull an all-nighter reviewing reports, maps, and plans, given her newfound place as a strategist. It made sense, as they were both going to infiltrate the Walls. It made sense.

God, and he had kissed her cheek. He shuts his eyes tight, trying not to imagine Pieck’s expression at his childlike display of affection. What is he, twelve years old? He covers his face with his hands and growls "You dumbass" into them.

"Is everything alright, Mr. Galliard?" Colt asks, startled.

"Yeah, m'fine. Go back to your book, Colt," Porco mumbles.

He spends the next few minutes mulling it over, trying to figure out what the hell is Pieck Finger planning but eventually giving up. Too anxious about the upcoming rendezvous, he decides walking around the ship may help him assuage his nerves.

He paces the narrow corridors trying very hard not to think about the impending situation. It's hard. Every once in a while an intrusive thought makes its way to his brain, much to his dismay.

_ ‘She didn't mean anything by that. It's just a work sleepover.’ _

_ ‘Pieck will probably have a sleeping bag ready for me, I should not have assumed she was propositioning me.’ _

_ ‘I should pick some condoms from the infirmary.’ _

He immediately slaps himself, the sharp sound bouncing off the walls and echoing in the empty space of the hallway.

"You should know by now she doesn't mean it like that…," he mutters to himself before adding "... probably".

Because he doesn't know with Pieck. She seems to constantly be outside of normal human behavior, whether it be by her superior intelligence or her eccentricity. Despite everything, though, she is still just human, and humans overall have very predictive patterns. Pre-battle lust is one of them, and the reason why the Marleyan military provides unlimited free condoms to its members.

With the threat of death looming on the horizon, the instinct to reproduce and preserve the species kicks in. Of course, at this point the “reproduction” part is not really rationalized, it just presents itself as an overwhelming need to have sex. And what better way to calm nerves and blow off steam than orgasms?

So it wouldn't be impossible for Pieck to… Given how they… And the way she worded it.  _ 'Would you like to spend the night with me?' _

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Porco makes his way to the infirmary —just in case, just to be safe, just in the unlikely event that something happens.


	2. Lost at Sea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Explicit content ahead!
> 
> Please leave a comment if you liked the fic, it means a lot to me and I love to read what parts you liked best!

Porco knocks on Pieck's door at 8:29.

"Coming," she calls, but then takes a full minute before saying, "You know what? Just get in here."

He has half a mind to tell her off for leaving the door unlocked, but the sight before him erases that thought. The room is a mess and Pieck is sprawled on the floor, holding the large map from their earlier meeting by its four corners with her own spread limbs to keep it from scrolling back into itself. The documents and materials Colt had mentioned earlier were strewn and covered almost all the available surfaces: the floor, the desk, part of the bed, and even a few somehow attached to the walls.

“Hi, Porco,” she greets him absentmindedly. “Can you give me a hand, please?”

Grumbling internally at the chaos, he tiptoes his way to the map, then kneels down and uses both of his hands to press on the top corners. Pieck thanks him quickly, but is so immersed in her work she doesn’t spare a glance his way.

“Sorry, I thought I would be done before you arrived."

"It's fine," he says softly. He admires her as she traces routes on the map with her finger and then quickly scribbles garbled notes in an open notebook. There’s something about this Pieck —focused and rational and extremely efficacious— that he can never get enough of, though he knows it’s inappropriate given their dire circumstances. Her intelligence and competence always shine through whatever the situation, but it’s even more evident when it seems the weight of the world on her shoulders.

"Can you please hand me over that report on your left?" she asks.

Porco passes the folder to her and she quickly scans its content, then annotates something on the map.

“I hope Reiner and General Magath make it here on time. You and I really need to get to land tomorrow night.”

"It's… it's that bad, huh?"

Pieck’s smiles are a whole language unto itself. She has a small, secret happy smile when she is scheming something; and a lopsided grin when things go her way (which he loathes and adores); and a wry, rebellious one that is but the barest of twitches on the left corner of her mouth when things do not favor her. She has a thousand others, all of them carefully documented in Porco’s head.

This time, as she lifts her head and finally looks at him, her expression is thoroughly neutral, something as rare and disconcerting as a sudden eclipse. That enough is an answer to his question.

There is a cold chill that shoots through Porco’s body at the realization. He is not one to hide his emotions —even if he wanted to, for diplomacy’s sake. The past few weeks had been full of them: overwhelming fear and rage during the attack. The uncertainty and frustration that came in the aftermath, when no one was sure of what to do when everything had to be done at the same time. The painful, heart-wrenching sadness at the loss of friends and family. And now, something he would come to define as hopelessness.

Pieck returns to the documents, pushing and stacking the stuff around her and clearing a bit of space on the cabin floor.

“There’s no point in worrying about that now. Tomorrow we’ll have more than enough time to go through this with Reiner and the general,” she says cheerfully, a change so drastic to her previous demeanour it makes it evident Pieck has closed the subject for the night.

“Right,” he says and takes the map he had been holding open, then scrolls it into itself forming a tube. “So, about tonight…” he opens, trying to sound casual as he bends over and attempts to gather a few papers.

“Just leave the rest of the stuff on the floor, it’s fine,” she interrupts him. “I have a system.”

 _‘I’m sure you do,’_ Porco thinks as he nods and straightens his back. Pieck uses her hands to push her hunched figure upright.

“Oof,” she groans and places her hand on her lower back for support. “I think I overdid it. Being on all fours is usually the most comfortable for me but…”

Porco observes her as she worms her way onto the bed, knocking the few documents laying there dismissively onto the floor and stretches, spreading her legs and arms like a starfish.

“Is that part of your system?” he teases.

Pieck turns her head to him and her mass of dark waves falls on her face, covering everything except for her brown eyes, tired yet somehow bright.

“Come over here,” she beckons with a slightly muffled voice. “I need you to crack my back.”

“Uh…” he manages to utter, not sure what to respond. “I guess I can do that.”

He makes his way to the bed and sits on the side, then takes an inordinate amount of time unlacing and removing his boots. His mind is racing, thinking on how to go about the task at hand.

He knows exactly how to make someone’s back crack. He has given his fair share of massages and back rubs, but most of them have been of the sensual type that preceded a casual sexual encounter. Which is what is happening right now, right?

"Umm… I'm going to put my legs on each side of your hips. Is that alright?"

"Mhmm," she assents.

Porco straddles her butt, carrying most of his weight on his knees. He begins pressing her back with gentle firmness, his hands forming an arrow of sorts that pushes down and forward in tiny increments.

“So, about tonight...” he tries again, but trails off as little sighs of relief escape Pieck's mouth.

Porco's brain cannot tell them apart from moans of pleasure. Despite both of them being fully clothed, the provocative sounds (in addition to having his crotch pressed against her bottom) start having an effect on him.

_Crack._

"Ooh, right there," Pieck exhales.

He keeps going upwards bit by bit until he reaches her shoulders, then goes all the way down to the base of her spine and repeats. This time nothing cracks, and he places his hands on her shoulders, working a light massage into them.

“Thank you, Porco, that feels wonderful,” she mumbles, and wiggles her butt against him.

He draws in a sharp breath, hoping his condition is not too noticeable. In that moment, the whole ship is swayed by an inconvenient, rogue wave that crashes on its side and pushes him off-balance. Porco manages to place his hands on either side of Piecks’s head as his body is thrusted forward by the kinetic energy, barely avoiding falling on her.

An inconvenient, rogue condom also falls out of the breast pocket of his jacket and lands on the bed, right in front of Pieck’s line of sight.

“Oh!” she exclaims, and Porco quickly snatches it back, stuffing it back into his pocket.

“Shit! N-no! That’s…!” he sputters as he crawls off of her, blushing furiously, his whole body shaking and on-edge from the adrenaline of the rolling sea and the mortifying situation.

He’s still scrambling to find the words to explain —to properly describe the thought process behind bringing condoms blindly to a vague invitation instead of, y’know, picking them up from the infirmary after both of them agreed intercourse would happen— when Pieck speaks.

“It’s good to know you are prepared for safe sex,” she comments, “but we won’t use them tonight.”

“Oh.”

Of course. _‘You dumbass’._

Porco feels his heart sinking, unsure if it’s from the ship rocking itself to balance or her rejection.

“I… I should leave,” he says, crushed.

He slides his legs off the bed and sits on the edge, trying to stop the slight shaking that hasn’t stopped.

“Leave?” Pieck asks, a slight surprise that comes off rather as alarm to her voice. “I mean, I was hoping we’d do it raw, but we can use condoms if it's that important to you.”

The way his heart jumps all the way to his throat is not natural.

“What do you…?” he asks as he turns his head to her, and she is (once again) already looking at him. She seems to be waiting for him to complete his question, and he is not sure if it’s sincere or if she’s pretending.

"Fuck," he curses and passes his hand through his hair before slumping forward and hanging his head. 

He is annoyed that she is so nonchalant about this, but at the same time he can't help but be relieved. For a few seconds he had thought he had crossed a line, offended her with his assumptions about the nature of their reunion and had irreparably caused a breach in their relationship.

Why, though? Anyone in his place would assume her invitation to be sexual. They had, after all, been intimate plenty of times throughout the years. They have never had penetrative sex before, of course, but it was hard to imagine that their previous encounters are just friendly and platonic when he has the exact count of how many times he has made her cum with his tongue alone (nine). Why had he been terrified of being wrong?

He can feel Pieck moving as the mattress shifts under her weight. She sits behind him with her legs bent to the side and wraps her arms around his torso, resting her head on his back. Once again, an immediate sense of relief washes over his whole body the moment she touches him.

“Porco,” she calls his name quietly, but he doesn’t answer.

They stay like that for a minute, then Pieck slinks off the bed and opens a drawer from her desk, taking out a half-empty bottle of wine. “Do you want a drink?”

He looks at it and sighs, then nods in resignation before she passes the bottle to him.

“I don’t have any glasses here, so you’ll have to drink directly from it,” she apologizes.

“It’s fine,” he murmurs as he uncorks the bottle and swings his head back to gulp the wine. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and passes the bottle back to Pieck, who plops on the bed next to him and does exactly the same.

He looks at her from the corner of his eye and he can’t help but give a tiny snort at how proficiently she downs the remaining liquid in the bottle in a single go. She is somewhat of a heavy drinker and takes full advantage of her body’s regenerative capabilities to avoid damaging her liver (and getting hangovers).

Pieck enjoys getting drunk. It isn’t very often —their line of work didn’t allow for such opportunities on the regular— but whenever it happens she gets _wasted_. She takes a myriad of bad decisions, trips over her own skirt, tries to get everyone as drunk as her, and then disappears for random periods of time only to appear behind Porco as if she had been there all along.

He worries for her and frequently tries half-heartedly to stop her after her fifth or seventh drink of the night, but mostly he lets her have it. Those are the only times in which she seems to be able to fully let herself go, so he just tries to take care of her while Pieck goes wild. 

And who is he to judge? They all had their coping methods. Zeke is (was?) a smoker, Pieck is a drinker, Reiner is a caffeine addict and Porco… Porco has food. And Pieck.

He doesn't really _have_ her, of course. She is the one who _has_ him, and whatever form that may present itself as —her needing support, wanting someone to tease, or just someone to fool around with before the most important mission of their lives— there he would be. 

He rubs his face with his hands and lays down, and she joins him after setting the bottle on the cabin floor.

“I’m sorry, Porco,” she begins, and he is momentarily startled.

“Why are you apologizing?” he finally manages to say.

“For being so selfish."

“Self–? What are you talking about?” he asks, now even more confused.

"I should have explained properly from the beginning. I just went on as usual instead of considering what you may be feeling. I think you got emotionally whiplashed back there."

Porco snorts softly at the term, since it is very appropriate. He places one hand on top of hers.

“I don’t know about selfish, but you’re always like this so it’s not… It’s not like I didn’t know, I just thought you were turning me down back there.”

He had thought she would laugh at that, but her words come out with an unexpectedly surprised tone to them.

“I’m the one who is always coming onto you. If anything, it would be you who would do the rejecting around here. I would never turn you down for anything.”

Porco rolls his eyes as a tactic to prevent a blush from forming. _‘It doesn’t mean what you think it does, dumbass.’_

“Please, spare me the act,” he says. “You know exactly how I–”

He stops. Why must he get his feelings involved? What is the point of bringing them up when this is clearly just a physical thing? _‘Just get her to confirm it is about sex and move on.’_

“Pieck, why did you ask me over?”

She smiles and interlaces her fingers with his.

“It’s just…” she says and pauses. “When we left Liberio a few days ago, I did so with the idea of not going back. I do not want to have any regrets. That is why I invited you tonight.”

 _‘It doesn’t mean what you think it does, dumbass,’_ his mind repeats, a bit less sure this time.

“Regrets?” he asks, stunned. “W-why would you have any regrets?”

“Don’t tell me you wouldn’t regret it if I die and you never got to tap this?” she says as she brings his hand to her bottom and makes him slap it.

Porco takes his hand back, and then grumbles an annoyed “You’re not going to die.”

“You don’t know that,” she says calmly as she bends her knees to her chest to acquire enough impulse to stand up. She proceeds to unzip and unfasten her skirt. It falls to the ground, pooling around her ankles and Porco, who has elbowed his way into a sitting position, is left breathless and bewildered at the sight, his mouth hanging open. 

“In any case, _I_ would regret it, you know?" she continues as she takes off her shirt by pulling it over her head, not bothering to unbutton it. "Never having gone all the way with you when I have–” 

She stops as she sees his eyes going wide and the apple in his throat bob.

"Well, it doesn't matter. The thing is, I don’t know if I’ll survive this one, so if you're okay with it–”

In one swift motion she pushes him back with a surprising amount of strength onto the bed and straddles him. He should not be as surprised as he is, given that Pieck is a soldier (a Warrior) after all.

“–just let me have this,” she finishes.

A shiver forms in the pit of his stomach, travels south in a slow wave, and settles between his legs. Porco is more action than words —always has been— so he lets his body do the talking.

 _‘I'll let you have it, alright,’_ his body says as his hands grip her waist and effortlessly rolls her so that he is now on top.

 _‘But before anything...’_ his body says as he hurriedly takes off his jacket and trousers and throws them on the floor. 

_‘...I’m gonna make you beg for it,’_ his body says as he grabs her wrists, pinning her to the bed and his lower half settles between her spread legs.

She looks at him with satisfied amusement and smiles in a way that shows that she is still the one in control despite being pinned to her bed.

Annoyed by the thought and by his own arousal at this, he closes the distance between their faces. Pieck tilts her face and parts her lips but he stops a few millimeters short of a kiss, instead moving to the side of her neck and giving a long lick that makes her gasp.

She squirms helplessly as he uses his tongue, bucking her hips against his as she is currently restrained otherwise. There is only the thin fabric of their respective underwear as a barrier, so it doesn’t take long for him to get hard again. 

In their previous encounters, Pieck didn’t make a lot of noise. This time she seems to have let go of whatever held her back before. She emits soft squeaks as his tongue moves up and down her neck and shoulder. 

“Pieck,” he whispers in a raspy voice and kisses his way up again, spending a few seconds to trace the shape of her ear with the tip of his tongue, before moving to her cheek and the corner of her mouth.

“Porco,” she calls for him, and he hovers just above her lips before planting a small kiss on the other corner of her mouth.

She whines and arches her back to press herself to him. “Porco, please.”

He glances at her and her cheeks are flushed, a small frown that pushes her eyebrows together in frustration. This makes his grip on her wrists slack just the tiniest bit, but it’s enough for Pieck to turn the tables on him.

He doesn’t even know how it happens. The next thing he knows is soft, warm lips pressed against his, small hands clutching at his shoulders, and Pieck on top of him. Again.

So much for making her beg for it, but he finds that he doesn’t mind at all because her kiss is delicious and fuck, what a fool he had been to avoid it for something as silly as his pride. His whole body relaxes and goes soft (except for a certain appendage between his legs), moving against her so that they touch more and more, melting into each other.

There is a small part of him that desires to be joined with her. Not necessarily about sex, because he has had plenty of sex before and this burning need had never been present before. It’s more of a yearning to be together forever, for her to be a part of him and for him to merge right into her. His rational mind knows it’s beyond stupid, but a tiny part of him is convinced it might be achieved if they rub their bodies together enough. But their clothes are in the way.

He grabs the bottom of her camisole and pulls it slightly to let her know his intentions. Pieck smiles into the kiss and breaks it so say “Take it off.”

She sits back up on his lap and lifts her arms. He continues to pull the fabric upward and, bit by bit, her body is revealed. First her navel, then her torso, where her fine-boned rib cage is clearly defined under her skin (almost sticking out) and he worries for a second of just how thin she is before his mind is hijacked by breasts: small but very pretty, all olive skin and dusky brown nipples. She has to finish taking off her camisole since Porco's mind is currently unavailable, and tosses it onto the floor to join the rest of the mess.

“I want to see you, too,” Pieck purrs, sliding her fingers under his white undershirt. He complies quickly, not one for theatrics or teasing.

She is hit with a similar exhilaration to Porco’s own a few moments earlier at the sight of his bare chest. She has seen him shirtless before but never in an intimate scenario, and that makes all the difference.

“You are so beautiful,” she says, eyeing his muscular, almost hairless torso up and down with evident relish. 

There is an uncharacteristic feeling of self-consciousness that makes him want to cover himself. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t more than a bit vexed that she always gets to be this smooth, but he’d also be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy this inversion of roles. This is particularly true now, because the woman he had been pining for since he was a teenager is admiring and sweet-talking him and his brain is scrambling to get it together. A burgeoning hope that she has always wanted him the way he wants her —but had been holding back— flickers in his heart as she licks her lips while her bright, brown eyes take him in whole.

 _'What if it is true?'_ his mind wonders.

 _'What if it is not?'_ he responds to himself.

Pieck leans down to press her chest against his, and his mind shuts up immediately. Skin-to-skin contact is sublime because there is so much of it now that most of their clothes are off. Soft, warm, supple.

Since he is somewhat taller, she wiggles her way up to kiss him. Once there, it’s so easy for her to writhe against him and moan his name. Her fingers roam wherever his skin is not covered by her body: his sides, his shoulders, his arms, his neck. She intones his name softly, and then “you feel so good against me.”

His hands, which had been clutching her waist, move down and slide under her bloomers, grabbing her small, soft bottom and groping it lustfully. 

"Wait till I am inside you," he groans, regaining a bit of his usual edge, and she sucks in air through closed teeth.

Porco rolls them both so that now he is on top and proceeds to kiss his way down to her breasts. He licks her nipple softly, circling and teasing it, and soon he feels her legs squirm under him. He guides her thighs to wrap around his waist, and jerks his hips against hers with practiced accuracy.

Pieck inhales sharply and threads her hand on his hair. He would normally protest about it, as he hates having his hair messed up, but he can't bring himself to care, not right now.

His and her underwear are discarded at some point. Neither of them knows for sure when it happened or even who removed them because when he presses his cock against her folds and slides along it nothing else matters.

This is usually where they stop, but tonight… 

He pushes himself back up to sit on his heels, wanting to see her face as much as possible. Using his hand to guide himself, he presses the head of his hard cock against her entrance, then teases it drawing circles around it.

The heaviness in her eyes, usually from exhaustion, is now replaced by want. It is made even more evident by her blush, extending from her forehead to her sweet cheeks, and heavy breathing.

Her core pulses, trying to pull him inside, and he almost gives in, but he knows how much better it will feel for her to delay penetration until later. It's also a matter of pride. He will never give up trying to make her as needy for him as he is for her. So he has to stall.

"Can I go down on you?" he asks.

Pieck blinks, confused. "Oh… sure," she agrees. The change of plans is not exactly disappointed, more like a little frustrating after being so ready for him. She could just ask him to go on. She is certain he would not deny her that if she asks, but she is also curious as to what he is planning and goes along with it.

The bed is not very large, so he moves off of it so that she can comfortably spread out and part her legs.

Normally, he would take his time kissing her thigh and teasing her wetness to get her ready for him before eating her out, but this time it wouldn’t work as intended. Starting over slowly would just feel off and the earlier build up would have been for nothing, so he goes directly for her clit and flicks his tongue back and forth aggressively.

It works. Pieck throws her head back in delight and swallows a high-pitched scream. He once again teases her entrance, now with his finger, then inserts it —not much, only as far as the first knuckle, then pulls it out and spreads her juices along her sex.

"More… Porco… inside...," Pieck requests with a raspy voice.

He pauses for a few seconds to answer her. "Not yet," he brushes her off, then goes back to licking her swollen button.

Without using his fingers it usually takes longer for her to cum, but he wants to heighten her anticipation. Besides, they are finally together with as much time to spend on each other as they please. No more hurrying because Reiner and Porco are roommates and the blond Warrior could come back any moment. No more frantic fingering while eating her out under her desk at the headquarters hoping to make her cum before the midday meeting.

Clear, slightly thick lubrication begins to drip out of her entrance, and he feels his cock twitch with excitement. He rubs himself briefly, but as soon as Pieck’s legs start shaking he places both of his hands where her thighs meet her bottom, spreading his palms so that his thumbs are able to caress the thin layers of skin in her vulva with gentle, feathery strokes.

"Po-!" she squeals before a single, violent jerk of her pelvis against his face and her legs closing —knocking on his temples— catch him off-guard.

He continues for a few moments to help her ride her orgasm, then slows down. "Easy there," he chuckles while running his hands up and down her thighs. He plants a last kiss on her lower lips before reaching for the previously discarded undershirt to clean up his face.

"Oh, my goodness," she says breathily, her trembling legs sliding off the edge of the bed. 

He cradles her limp body in his arms and moves her properly onto the bed, then crawls beside her.

"You look pretty pleased with yourself," Pieck notes as she observes a sly grin from Porco.

"Not as much as you," he retorts, making her laugh.

"I can't say it isn't true," she admits and throws her arms around his neck. "Are you ready for the main course now?"

Raising his eyebrows as her hands make their way down his abdomen and straight for his erection, he considers this.

"Actually… Um… Would you suck me?" 

A look of genuine surprise forms in Pieck's face, and he feels his whole face heat up.

“Oh…”

“If you want!” he adds quickly.

"Of course. I do, no problem. It’s just... I thought you hated that," she comments as she looks straight into his eyes. 

Porco has never requested fellatio (at least from her). In fact, he has repeatedly avoided her offering it by quickly fixing his clothes and hair and making a hasty retreat whenever it seemed she would be eager to reciprocate his earlier dedication.

"N-no! I don't hate it. I mean…" he says, trying to find words. "I…"

She looks concerned. "Tell me."

He groans, then removes Pieck’s arms from around his neck and turns his body, laying down on the mattress and inspecting the roof in case it holds the key to getting out of the corner he has backed himself into in his desperation to stall some more. Porco doesn't want to say it out loud because she will laugh, but he also can't think of a viable excuse in time.

"The thing is…" he reluctantly explains. "Well, the thing is…"

Why had he asked for this? Blowjobs feel good, for sure, but they aren’t worth the humiliation.

He takes a deep breath and blurts out: "It's just that I was with _someone_ once and then she made a face while she was… down there and it kinda looked really long so I am worried since you kinda look like your Titan and…"

As he utters those words, Pieck's eyes grow big and round (which doesn’t happen often). Her face contorts as she tries to suppress laughter until she turns red and releases it like an explosion.

She laughs hysterically for what seems forever to Porco, who is blushing furiously but secretly pleased. He had never seen her laugh like this. After a minute, her laughter turns into piglike snorts, and hearing herself like that makes it even funnier for her.

Tears roll down her cheeks and she clutches her stomach, gasping for air and trying to wheeze out an "I'm sorry" but unable to complete the phrase.

"Okay, I get it. I'm stupid," Porco grumbles, trying to move forward and stop the humiliation.

It takes some time for the laughter to fizz out, but she finally manages to reduce it to a weak flow of chortles.

"Oh, goodness," she says and wipes away the tears. "My jaw hurts, but I guess it's a good warm-up."

She winks at Porco and then giggles again. "You know, that issue can be easily fixed by closing your eyes."

Porco huffs. "But I don't want to close my eyes. I want to see you," he mumbles

Pieck fixes her gaze on him tenderly, her eyebrows furrowed with fondness, and caresses his cheek before planting a soft kiss on his lips. This seems to make him less uneasy.

"I'll try my best to not make weird faces," she says mischievously, gathering her legs beneath her "Wouldn't want you to pop a boner whenever the Cart Titan is in front of you".

Before he can get angry again, she bends over him, placing her hands on the bed, on each side of his head. Her dark hair falls like a curtain around both their faces and the rest of the world disappears around them. They are alone, lost at sea and in the moment (and, for Porco, in Pieck’s eyes). He gulps audibly.

"I'm sorry I laughed," she says calmly and kisses him again.

He immediately circles her waist with his hands, so natural and automatic it seems as if that is where they belong. Her own hands travel down to his shoulders and then his chest, where she presses down softly as she supports her own body to lean in. She places her lips on the crook of his neck, then kisses her way to his collarbone and to his other shoulder.

Porco whimpers at her gentle touch, and he can feel her smile against his skin.

"I'll make you feel really good, Porco," she whispers and moves her head further down at the level of his chest.

As she places her lips over his right nipple and licks, he groans and lets out a breathless "Fuck…"

Pieck hums a tiny giggle and uses the tips of her fingers to tease the other to hardness. She usually scolds him playfully whenever he curses, but this time she lets him. Something inside of her does not mind him using that sort of language this time.

Using her nails to lightly scrape against his skin, her hand goes lower and lower along his hard abs until it reaches the very light patch of hair beneath his navel. Her fingers curl around his base and he immediately throws his head back, swallowing a moan. Despite the rigidity of Porco’s member, the skin is soft and velvety and she caresses it loosely, more in an exploratory fashion than with the purpose of pleasing.

She unlatches her lips from him and lifts her head to observe his flushed chest, shoulders, neck. This gives Pieck a big sense of satisfaction, and she decides to dive fully into the experience so she lets go of him to get comfortable enough.

He can feel her moving around the bed. When he opens his eyes she is settling between his legs, looking at his hard cock with eager curiosity.

"Hmm, how shall we go about this?" she muses, and he wonders if he should be alarmed as her mouth curls into a ‘science project’ smile.

His cock is flush against his belly, a bead of precum blooms on its swollen head. She takes him gingerly from the base and propping it with her thumb so that it stands up straight, and just keeps it that way, observing it with great interest. Overcome with mortification and the need to snap to her, he grounds himself by curling and uncurling his fingers into fists. He does not want to be rude to her, not even when he feels it may be justified.

The giddiness she is feeling is not evident to Porco, and that may be a good thing. Pieck doesn’t really have any practical experience in the area because —apart from her escapades with Porco— all of her sexual encounters have occurred in a state of drunken stupor. She has hardly any recollection of them, not even of her first time (she is about 62% sure it was with Zeke several years back, but it could have very well been with a guy from her first Panzer team).

How hard could it be, really? If anything, she is confident in her ability to render theory into action, and she had theory aplenty. As Warrior candidates, they had been given a very thorough, very scientific sex education. As a teen, she had devoured book after book of every subject available to her through the Military library (and sexual practices had been covered in a few of them). Hell, even more unconventional media like the stash of erotic magazines she had stumbled upon once in a storage room, all of them probably confiscated from soldiers in the Eldian division because the publications featured young Marleyan women, which they were not allowed to look at.

It shouldn't be too complicated, she doesn't think. And, in any case, she can always ask him for guidance if she needs it.

"Relax. Close your eyes," Pieck says very slowly. Following her instructions, he takes a deep breath and then she lowers her head and takes him in her mouth as far as she can comfortably take him.

"Oh, shi–!" Porco exclaims, crossing his arms over his face. He had not been prepared for this. He had thought she would give tentative licks, no go straight for the kill.

She once again hums a giggle. There is a faint taste of soap on him, which does not surprise her at all given how fussy he is about his hygiene and his appearance. Still, there is a heady, sensual smell to it that excites her and makes her mind just the tiniest bit less sharp. She finds it interesting, how instinct can take over even the most rational of minds.

Her technique is basic at the most —she just bobs her head in a slow rhythm, relaxing her jaw enough to avoid scraping her teeth against his skin— but Porco is losing his mind.

He has no idea how to tell her to stop, because he doesn’t _want_ her to stop, but it’s too much. He had not actually thought about this beforehand, he had just wanted to stop sex from happening too soon and now he is losing his mind from the wet warmth of Pieck’s mouth.

As if she had sensed his distress, she stops and disengages from his penis and straightens up. 

“Is that good? I’m gonna move over here to be more comfortable,” she explains, moving closer to him.

“Oh, fuck. What are you doing?” Porco asks breathlessly as she drops down between his thick legs and snakes her arms around them until her shoulders poke the back of his thighs and her hands are on top of his hip bones. 

There is no answer from her but kisses to the soft skin on the inside of his thigh, and then up his cock and back down again. One of her hands reaches to stroke him as her tongue focuses on the spot on the back side of the head, deducing it would be a rather sensitive part of his penis. 

There is a moment when their eyes meet, and a massive shiver courses through his entire body, forcing him to close them again. Even though they have only just begun he feels himself getting closer to the edge.

“S-slow down,” he pleads. “Or I’ll… I’ll…”

Pieck stops her mouth to speak. “Oh, no. We don’t want that” —and a lick— “You have to come inside of me.”

And he gives a strangled groan and comes right then, quite against his will and surprising both of them. His seed does not shoot out but rather drips down from the half-built orgasm, and it’s embarrassing as well as unsatisfying.

"Fuck–" he mutters, breathing hard. "You can't just… you can't just say things like that."

Porco is awfully red and strands of his blond hair have already fallen from his slicked-back hairstyle. He blindly grabs for his white shirt again to clean himself up.

“I’m sorry,” she apologizes meekly. “Did it not feel good? I can do it again, if you want.”

“No, it’s fine. It’s just… you almost literally tore that orgasm from me.”

“Oh! That doesn’t sound very pleasant,” she says.

“I’ve had worse,” he blurts and immediately regrets it because Pieck proceeds to ask exactly what he didn’t want her to.

“Really?! When?” she nosily asks.

“I don’t wanna tell you,” he replies dryly.

“Awww, come on. Tell me and I’ll tell you about my–”

“I _definitely_ don’t wanna hear that,” he interrupts her, and she laughs.

“It’s not like there’s a lot for me to recount,” she confesses. “I barely remember anything.”

Porco raises an eyebrow. Even he, with his own casual sex partners, had the courtesy of remembering (most of) their names. “And that doesn’t bother you?” he inquires.

She purses her lips and considers the question.

“Not really, no. It’s just sex. And with our regeneration and healing powers everything goes back to the way it was before, every time,” she explains and places a hand on the small curve beneath her belly button. “So it’s not exactly hard to just go on without thinking too much about it.”

“Oh… so… down there?”

He knew that already, in theory, but had never stopped to actually consider that her hymen returned after intercourse. Another item is added to his subconscious list of worries.

“Yeah, it just gets regenerated every time,” she continues. “But I have this very interesting theory that if there’s something inside me and I activate it in that moment, it should technically heal around it and retain that shape.”

She looks pointedly between his legs, and then raises her eyes to meet his. “I would like to try that with you, if you’re up for it.”

A very hot tremor courses through Porco’s body and he is rendered speechless. Pieck uses this opportunity to drag her body sensually against his, reaching his lips. Her mouth hovers above his, her pink tongue darting for a second to wet her own.

She scoots her hips until she is sitting on his lap, her cunt pressed against his cock, which is getting harder by the second.

“I want you, Porco.”

Only the tiniest “fuck” escapes his lips before he pulls her face to his, their mouths crashing and their bodies writhing.

“Quickly, please,” she breathes, trying to wrap her legs around his waist but he rolls them to their side, and he overwhelms her with kisses, with feverish caressing and groping.

She moans his name again and again, and eventually it comes out as a desperate whine, a petition to get on with it.

“Wait,” he says disentangling his limbs from their embrace. “Let me get the condoms.”

“We said no condoms,” she reminds him, but he doesn’t answer or look at her, instead focusing on retrieving his jacket and finding which pocket he had stuffed the rogue prophylactic into a while back.

"Porco, is something the matter?" Pieck asks with concern. "You seem... not want to have sex."

He turns to her, bewildered.

"N-no. I mean, I do!" he stutters in panic. "I mean…"

“We don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with,” she voices calmly.

“I do, it’s just…”

He wants her. He cares for her. And those two very different things have coexisted in his mind for years, but for some reason combining them terrifies him.

He _cares_ for the Pieck who is an intelligent, kind, funny, loyal older sister. He cares for the Pieck who is too lazy half of the time, who walks on all fours because it's more comfortable, and who forgets to brush her hair at least twice a week.

He _wants_ the Pieck who has been the star of his masturbatory fantasies since he was a teen. He wants the Pieck who locks both of them in a cramped closet to dry hump and then act as if nothing had happened two minutes later.

Porco’s casual hookups with other women fit perfectly into that dichotomy. They represent the want, and the care is so absent the moment they walk out of his bed they are out of his life. But he can’t do that with Pieck. He realizes it once sex with her is on the table, because he would never be able to do that to her. There is no such thing as two Piecks. There is no such thing and wanting one Pieck and caring for another one. He _loves_ her, and that is something he has had to rationalize and compartmentalize these sides as different entities to make sense of his feelings, because that seems to work for her.

“I love you,” he declares, and she smiles.

“I know, Porco. I lo–”

“No! I _love_ you, Pieck!” he says again desperately, almost shouting.

This genuinely catches her off-guard, and her eyes go wide. Porco’s whole face turns a very dark shade of red but he powers through.

“I have been in love with you since I was fourteen years old. Being here like this with you is a dream, and… I know it’s just sex and it doesn’t mean that much to you but…”

He passes down saliva.

“I want it to mean something, Pieck. I don’t want to have meaningless sex with you. I want…”

And he finally raises his face to look at her, and his eyes are so filled with a tender determination, Pieck feels her stomach fill with butterflies and her ears getting warm.

“I want to make love to you. I want to kiss you and hear you say my name as we are joined and make you understand how I feel and… I want you to love me.”

Porco is certain she could read him like an open book, she knows him too well. Her expression is neutral, much like the one she had worn when he had first entered the room. He has no idea how much his declaration has shocked her.

"Porco, I do love you," she says seriously, when she regains the ability to talk a few seconds later.

"Not like that," he says. "Not like…"

There is a moment of silence, and Pieck continues.

"Not like you, no," she concedes. "But still… What I feel for you is the closest I will ever get to true love, you know."

She states it simply and matter-of-factly, but he understands. He has known her long enough to have realized she had closed her heart years before to avoid pain, for her and for others. It was only natural, when she would not live past 25 years of age. A little over a year left.

It still amazes him how she could do it, but she has always been a mystery to him. 

"Pieck…"

"If that is not enough for you, I understand," she says, and she smiles.

And it's not her knowing smile, or her teasing smile, or her scheming smile. It's one he has not often seen before. It is not necessarily one of dejected resignation, but definitely one of acceptance. Pieck is so smart and she knows him so well, she can probably deduce what he will do next. But her smile denotes her surrendering logic in favor of uncertainty. She wants to feel the nervousness of not knowing the outcome, of being on the same level as he usually is with her. This touches him.

"If that is enough for me…" he grumbles. "You know… you know it is, damnit."

He can feel the prickling of tears forming in the corner of his eyes. He could fight it. He has years of experience suppressing them, so it should be easy enough. But he doesn't. Fighting tears means he has to convince himself the issue at hand did not matter, and Pieck means the world to him.

"I love you," he says again and it comes out wobbly. This makes him burst out crying, and he lunges forward to hug her and bury his face on her neck.

Pieck is taken aback but she quickly recovers and returns his embrace, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and kissing the top of his head. She makes soothing sounds to calm him down. 

“Porco.”

She whispers his name through his hair as she affectionately moves her hand up and down his back. “I am so lucky to be here with you.”

He says nothing and she continues.

“You're the one who knows me best.”

He scoffs. "Please, I have to guess what you're thinking half the time."

"But don't you always guess it correctly?"

He says nothing.

"We have been together for so long. And, you know, you are the person closest to me."

It is true. Not her dearest father, from whom she kept countless secrets and feelings to spare him from the pain. Not Zeke, who despite their partnership and level of intelligence in common was always too self-involved and distant —now it all made sense. Not Reiner, who had his own issues and traumas after the failed Paradis mission and also kept to himself.

Only Porco had been consistently, unfailingly by her side, always worrying about her and caring for her.

"I hope you believe me," she says, her voice cracking.

This alarms Porco, who immediately pulls back to check on her. She smiles at his on instinct to reassure him, and his face softens.

"I do believe you. You also… Closest to me."

"I know."

They hug again, a warm feeling spreading all over their bodies. She rubs his back slowly and he tries to stroke her hair with his fingers but it’s kind of tangled so he just pats the top of her head.

"Sorry for killing the mood," he says regretfully.

Pieck shakes her head no reassuringly. "No, you didn't. In fact, you made me even more aware of how long we have been in each other's life."

She moves so that their eyes meet once again, and her dark brown eyes are full of warmth.

"Porco, thank you. Thank you for always being beside me," she says softly, brings his hand to her lips and kisses it gallantly.

He gives a short, wry laugh as his cheeks flare up. “Why is it always you that ends up being the cool one?” 

She laughs. “I can’t help it, it comes to me naturally,” she states with practiced mock humility.

He grins at her. “You know, what comes naturally to you I have to work three times as hard to get right.”

“I am more than happy to help you achieve that level of coolness, Mr. Galliard,” she offers slyly. “No matter how many times it takes you to get it right” There is an uncharacteristically flirtatious lilt to her words, accentuated by her slightly quirked brows that seem to be beckoning him.

“You are too kind, Ms. Finger,” he continues their improvisation and pulls her to him roughly. “Mind if we get started?”

She answers him by puckering her lips and closing her eyes, waiting for him to make the first move. He chuckles at the adorable display and gives her a quick smooch, then moving to her cheeks with small, swift kisses and she giggles as he reaches her neck. The first few tickle her skin, but soon they become sensual and she shivers until her whole body is covered in goosebumps.

What started as fairly wholesome kissing turns sinful rather fast. To make up for the lost time, they meet each other with hurried desperation, their mouths crashing together, his hard-on pressed against her thigh, her hands groping his behind. They keep going and before they know it, he’s on top of her, fully aligned and just a thrust away from consummation.

“Hey,” Porco manages between kisses. “So… no condoms, right?”

“Mhm,” she hums in confirmation. “I want to feel all of you.”

He pushes inside of her and he can't help shudder as his cock is buried bit by bit into the tight, soft, wetness of her sex. She tenses up slightly and takes deep breaths.

"You okay?"

She nods, not opening her eyes. "Yeah, just keep going. Slowly."

He isn't very far inside, so he slides back out and then pushes in gently, only going further in than that first one by very little. He repeats it over and over, easing his way inside.

Pieck observes Porco's face. His eyes are closed, he is biting his lower lip and his eyebrows are knit tight. She is suddenly emotional because he is always so mild with her. She had been aware of his feelings —to some extent— for some time, but him declaring it to her face had hit differently. Her eyes water a little, which in turn makes her nose just the tiniest bit runny. When she draws a sharp breath to clear it, Porco opens his eyes.

"Pieck, are you alright? Does it hurt? Do you want me to stop?" he asks, alarmed by her tears.

"No, no, no, no," she coos and smiles, making the tears pooled in her eyes roll down her cheeks. "These are happy tears, Porco."

"Oh…"

His face is stuck between a tiny smile of relief and the typical expression of confusion he is only able to make when Pieck is involved.

"So it doesn't hurt?"

"Just a little, but I’m not made of glass. I’m a Warrior, after all. You can keep going just like that."

He leans forward to kiss her cheeks —first the right one, then the left one— on the wet trails of her tears.

Without another word, he thrusts in a slow, steady rhythm filling her bit by bit. Something tears and she winces, but he keeps going until he’s all the way inside.

She wraps her arms around his neck and beckons him closer. As their lips touch, she instinctively clenches her core and he moans into the kiss.

"Wha-? That was…" he pants breathlessly. “It’s so hot.”

Pieck smirks at his flushed, pleasure-filled face. “I told you I was going to heal it with you inside. Keep moving or we’ll get fused together.”

“Fuck,” he lets out a breathy laugh and does as he is told, pushing in and out of her with measured restraint.

The pain she had felt initially is melting into delicious pleasure from being filled completely, from the warmth of their bodies moving against each other, from the feeling of finally being joined, connected if only for the duration of their encounter.

Pieck’s has relied on her rationality to close her heart for many years. She knows there is no such thing as soulmates, or magical connections. Infatuation and physical attraction are a product of chemicals in the brain as part of an unconscious effort to preserve the species. Love and devotion are a result of bonding, also something natural in many animals as a way to build communities that ensure their safety in numbers and something that keeps its members from killing each other. 

But why not give in, for once? Why not pretend that her heart can feel something more than just platonic affection? Why not forget that their days are counted, and just act like they have their whole lives ahead of them? Why not let it be just Porco and her in the center of her life, for once? 

She surrounds his waist with her thin legs and digs her heels into his tailbone.

"Harder," she whispers in her ear and his body complies instantly, bypassing his own will.

The pleasure and the pain meld right at her center, and she lets herself feel everything. It is intense enough to stop her train of thought, and she is finally able to get into the moment.

He plants one forearm firmly on the bed, and with his other arm on the small of her back, he lifts her hips to pull her closer. They grind against each other to adjust until she is settled on the top of his thighs and he is hitting her deepest part.

Pieck instinctively wraps her legs around his waist and with that he slams into her hard and fast, releasing the passion he had been holding back for so long.

To finally look at her face is priceless. It had always been him with his face between her thighs, or them facing the same side. He had no idea how prettily she blushes, how she bites her bottom lip, how expressive her eyes are, or how she frowns with pure, helpless bliss when he hits a particularly good spot.

He wonders if she's baring it all or if she's still hiding something from him, from the world, but does it really matter? She is here with him right now in what seems to be sincere, rapturous delight.

"Porcooo," she sighs, and his mind shuts up finally because whatever part of her she wants him to see is enough for him. She is enough.

"Pieck," he answers her. They roll on the bed once more, with him still on top but her back lays flat on the mattress and he can kiss her again. So he kisses her as he thrusts fast and hard.

Every time his hips slam against hers, he is rewarded with a moan or a whimper, or even a small, whining "yes" and "oh…".

He holds himself up by the elbows to look down on her. She is blushing and glowing beneath him, and it's much, much more than he ever thought.

"Pieck, you… you have no idea… how much I-"

She cups his face and brings it down to her level. "I do… Me —ah!— Me, too."

“Wha… Since —ah, fuck— since when?”

“Ooh,” she keens, and her eyes roll to the back of her head and she has to swallow a high-pitched groan before continuing. “Fort Slava,” she pants. “All of the things... you —ah— you said you wanted to do with me.”

“I should have… I should have… sooner,” he pants.

"Doesn't matter… right now is perfect," she rambles.

They move against each other deliciously, and for now they are content with just being joined, closer than ever before. They have no rush to get anywhere, to get this over with. Their bodies change positions in a way that feels natural, making sure to explore each other thoroughly. He perches her ankles on his shoulders to get deeper. She is on top riding him, then she gets tired and he energetically drives into her from below to make up for it. They are both on their side to catch their breath and he fondles her breasts, follows the natural curve of her body down to her waist, then ass. From there, he easily shifts her body alongside his.

He has her on all fours and is pumping in and out of her hard and fast thanks to the purchase he has on her hips. As their bodies slam together, she can feel the vibrations grow deep inside, so much more intense than before.

It doesn’t take long for Pieck’s legs to start shaking, and it dawns on him that this position is the one she’d like best for obvious reasons.

“Are you close?” he asks, moving forward to whisper in her ear. 

“I don’t know,” she answers, and he responds to that by licking his index and middle fingers and slipping them between her legs to bracket her clit. He moves them quickly, creating a light but insistent friction on its flanks that feels wonderful and right and actually helps her orgasm build up faster.

Pieck takes handfuls of sheets in her fists, and finally her arms give up and she buries her face on the bed, her lower side only still standing because Porco is holding her upright. She pushes her ass against him as she cums, trying to get his cock to reach as deep as possible as her walls clench and unclench around him.

With a strangled groan, he releases his seed inside her, his whole body hot and flushed.

“Fuck,” he mutters and moves forward to wrap his arms around her from behind, then takes her with him as he falls to the bed on his side.

She rolls over so that she can face him and he slips out of her, a small string of fluids trailing along and sticking to the inside of Pieck’s thighs. 

“That was sublime,” she sighs, her eyes barely able to focus. He smiles at her and brings her close, embraces her. Their legs tangle together and she buries her face in the crook of her shoulder. “I could fall asleep right now.”

“Already?” he asks.

Her voice is barely audible when she answers a tired “We have time.”

They fall asleep in each other’s arms, relaxed and content. Half an hour later Pieck wakes up as Porco nuzzles her neck and presses his hard-on against her thighs and they love each other once more.

This process is repeated several times during the night. They don’t always climax, and once they even fall asleep, him thrusting lazily into her while spooning and Pieck dozing off with the reassuring rhythm.

Once she is on top and her hair gets in the way, so they stop so that he can braid it (with much difficulty because he is not good at it and her thick mat of hair is the opposite of silky). They don't have a hair tie, so it comes undone at some point in the night.

Another time she asks him to pull on her hair, which he does reluctantly and she immediately decides it hurts and it does nothing for her, and he tackles her (gently) to the bed, tickling and affectionately calling her a dumbass.

And they kiss a lot. God, Porco would die a happy man right there just for Pieck's kisses. They aren't particularly passionate or deep, just small pecks from her soft lips on his own. Small nibbles along his neck, tender kisses on his cheek. Everything is small, just like her, full of affection and fondness. They fall asleep for the final time that night with their lips pressed together.

Pieck is woken up by the shifting of the mattress as Porco slides off the bed, and the sound of sheets rustling.

“Where are you going?” she croaks, grabbing one of his ass cheeks.

Porco chuckles as he swats her hand away. “I’m gonna get dressed and get us breakfast.”

“No, stay,” she pleads weakly, still half-asleep. He gives her a tender gaze and smiles, but she doesn’t see it because her eyes are closed. 

“I’ll be back soon–,” he promises, but is cut short by her whining.

“Nooo, stay,” she moans. “Come here or I shall die of cold.”

Snorting, he sits on the edge of the bed. “I didn’t know there was a dramatic Pieck inside of you.”

“The only thing inside of me right now is your cum,” she says and Porco groans. She laughs heartily at her own joke. “Come here, Porco. Let’s stay in bed for a bit longer.”

Porco’s stomach growls. He is used to eating multiple times throughout the day, and after a very early light dinner the previous evening and nothing else, he is ravenous.

“And don’t say you’re hungry because you ate me real good last night,” she adds before he can utter a single word of protest.

The effect her words have on Porco are immediate. “Damn it, Pieck,” he mutters as he covers his mouth with his hand and blushes furiously, convinced she _can_ read his mind.

Pieck giggles at his flustered reaction and places her hand around his wrist to pull him into bed. He rolls his eyes (by force of habit, because he is smiling on the inside) and lets himself be swayed by the enticing coziness that awaits for him inside the blanket.

She brings him close, flush to her. They are both still naked, and he has to admit that the feeling of skin against skin is one he will never get tired of. They tangle their bodies together, legs and arms and her head under his chin. In less than a minute, Pieck’s breathing becomes heavy, and a little snore that sounds more like a gurgle indicates she is fast asleep again.

Porco is a morning person, and once he wakes up he cannot fall asleep again until many hours later. So he just lays there, holding Pieck and thinking about nothing. He does not want to be overwhelmed by any emotion --he wants neither happiness nor sadness in this moment, he just wants to feel her warm, slow breathing against his neck.

Her hair, dark and thick and messier than he had ever seen, all tangles and knots after last night, tickle his nose so he uses his hand to push it away, but instead stays there on top of her head. He uses a single finger to ravel it on a black strand and draws a circle round and round against her scalp tenderly, then removes the finger from the coil and repeats the process with another strand. 

He kisses her forehead and says softly “my love”, a whisper not meant for her ears. He does not want to complicate things with his feelings. 

Pieck lets out a big sigh in her sleep which makes him jump a little, then he smiles. She is alive right now. They are both alive right now, and that is enough.

At some point, he finally manages to slip out of her embrace, get dressed, and make a quick run to the galley. The selection of food is not great, as they had very little time to prepare before setting course to Paradis, but he manages to get a pear and an apple, five floppy slices of toast with butter and sugar, and several slices of fried ham that had gotten cold. He crams it all into a large plate and hooks the handle of two mugs of coffee on his fingers, and with the confidence of a seasoned waitress after years of practice and perfecting food transporting techniques, makes his way back to Pieck’s cabin.

When he enters, he finds her sitting on her bed with her back to him. She is still naked, her arms raised as she gathers her dark mass of curls into a high, messy bun, a few tendrils escaping and hanging from her thin, long neck and onto her smooth, arched back. Soft, warm light spills in from the porthole and lands on her body, sinuous and graceful, and he’s frozen in the spot unable to look away.

After a few seconds, Pieck turns to look at him and smiles and he is absolutely lost. It’s only until she says, “Can you please close the door? The cold is seeping in” that he breaks from his trance and remembers he is Porco Galliard, a Warrior, and is bringing breakfast to Pieck Finger’s room.

He hurries inside and closes the door, and carefully avoids the mess on the floor that hasn’t been moved since the night before.

“I got us breakfast and, no, you cannot use the same dirty joke twice in such a little span of time,” he says preemptively avoiding another double entendre.

She closes her mouth and chuckles. “Always a step ahead of me,” she says, and then gets distracted by the contents of the plate and the mugs. “Oooh, coffee. Thank you, Porco, I really need that today.”

Pieck drinks coffee out of necessity, not enjoyment, so she drinks it all black, no sugar or milk. She alternates small sips of the black beverage with bites of sugared toast.

“Wow, I’m hungrier than I expected,” she confesses, then takes another bite of the toast.

He steals a glance at her. He is glad she is regaining her appetite. It usually takes her at least three months to get used to eating normal amounts of food at regular intervals and regain her weight. Not that that is a concern to the Marleyan army, which pushes her to be Titanized for longer periods of time and cutting short her recovery periods.

And sometimes he wishes he could save her from the cruelty of war. She is so smart and strong. She could be a scientist. She could be a renowned professor or investigator at any university… but the only way she would ever be able to do this was becoming an honorary Marleyan. And that is a death sentence, an oath to dedicate her body and soul to the military, and she chose it as a child to save her father.

So even if he --if they-- ever decided to just run away to another country, another continent, live by themselves in a cabin in the middle of the woods, their families would suffer. 

The only thing he can do is stay by her side, supporting her. Her term will be over in 2 years, give or take, if the Rumbling doesn't happen. If they survive. If Marley doesn't decide to give the Cart to another person. If she doesn't decide to end her term early, exhausted.

And now it is he who has lost her appetite while Pieck takes an eager bite out of the fragrant pear. He still eats, pretending everything is still okay.

"Thank you, Porco," Pieck says softly.

"No problem. There wasn't a lot to choose from, though," he answers automatically, then as he sees her curious smile, he understands. "Oh… you were not talking about breakfast."

"Well…" she says and shrugs playfully. "Who knows?"

 _'Who, indeed?'_ Porco thinks to himself.

Pieck extends her arm to offer Porco a bite of her pear, and he bends down a little to get it. A bit of the sweet juice dribbles down the side of his mouth, and she reaches over to wipe it with her thumb.

"I would not change a thing. I have no regrets," she says as their eyes meet and lock together.

And it could be about anything. She would not change a thing about breakfast? About spending the night with him? About joining the Warrior program as a child?

Pieck said those words specifically to be ambiguous, so he would just have to find the meaning behind them by himself. Knowing how she is, though, he has very little doubts she said it in response to his private worries in his mind.

"Good. I have no regrets either," he says.

~ * ~

Pieck should have known better. “No regrets” had sounded good at the moment, and she even believed it for a bit. She had been so carefree; they both had been.

Reality came crashing down on them soon after they left her room, but the real pain started as they landed on the rocky northeast coast of Paradis. That is where Pieck and Zeke had abandoned Bertholdt and Annie. Where Marcel had lost his life not 48 hours into his mission.

They take turns in their Titan forms to get all the way to Wall Sheena before it dawns, and then make themselves pass as Paradisians.

It is not particularly hard to obtain information, with the current state of unrest of the nation, or even the Scout Regiment uniform. Reiner had told them that there existed a profitable black market for military equipment, even ODM gear, in the capital and they had been able to secure one uniform for each of them from a pawn shop in broad daylight.

From what Pieck had gathered, there was a lot of turmoil and unrest inside the ranks of the military after the attack on Liberio. There had been a large number of transfers and new recruits for the Scout Corps, and with a Jeagerist fraction forming and breaking off in a matter of days, it would not be hard for them to insert themselves into the fray. Which was somewhat of a relief. Maybe they could get information on Eren more easily than expected.

They had thought that on last night in the ship, when they had loved each other, they had been closer than ever.

They had been closer yet when they lay side by side, fully clothed, on the creaky bed of the room they had procured. It was what they assumed to be a disreputable inn in the outskirts of Stohess district, which served them well for the purposes of passing unadvertised. Fear, it seemed, was able to bring them closer than contentedness.

They had been closer yet when they fell asleep while holding hands, after swallowing the painful knots in their throats and comforting each other silently as their thumbs brushed softly together. Trust, it seemed, was able to bring them closer than fear.

And they are closer yet as they leave the inn first thing in the morning, all dressed up in their new uniforms. Porco kisses her forehead, and she stands on tiptoes to kiss his cheek and wishes him a good day at work (‘we could pose as a couple to give it more realism’, she had claimed at some point).

She gives him one last smile, her dark brown eyes shimmering as they meet his own, both of them now with a new-found sense of purpose and ready to sacrifice whatever was necessary to kill the Jaegers and save Gabi and Falco.

Pieck turns around and walks away, disappearing among the crowd in the busy street. Porco walks the other way, shoving his hands into the pockets of his Scout Regiment trench coat. Blind trust in the other, it seems, is able to bring them closer than anything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thanks to [Alex](https://twitter.com/MurasakiAlex) for beta-reading and to [Eli](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LivianLynx/profile) for [insight on Titan shifter hymens](https://twitter.com/AruBerus/status/1345040680893239296?).
> 
> If you like Pokopiku/Beruani/the Warriors, feel free to follow me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/gwenynbright) (shitposts, controversial opinions and art) or [Tumblr](http://professaurus.tumblr.com/) (just art), where I post more of my fanart (both sfw and nsfw).


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